Do Nail Stickers Work?

Hi Tory,

I RECENTLY LOST all of my nails - and you know how much I love my long talons. So now I have stumpy little stumpsteins from Stumpsylvania. Ugh. "Not to worry," I thought. "I'll get me some of them thar stick on nails. That'll do the trick."

Now it just so happens that I was in Primarni, and it just so happens that they have some oh-so-cute sets of false nails, and it just so happens that they are only £1 per set. Yes, ladies and lady boys, one pound of yer actual sterling on these beauties. (I had to buy two sets obviously - one is never enough. I'm paraphrasing Jacqueline Susann here, natch. Sparkle, Neely, sparkle!!)

sparkle, neely, sparkle!

What I didn't want to do, after years' of bitter experience, was use nail glue. Horrible stuff. Does terrible damage to your real nails and is a nightmare to get the false ones off. Really bad. Avoid it like the plague. So... what's a diva to do? Here's where the stickers part came in - press on, pull off. No mess, no damage, really simple, right?

Well... yes and no. The pull off part was the main problem. They were incredibly simple to put on and looked fantastic and professional and cute and all that - for literally five minutes. And then any amount of pressure that I put on my nails - and I'm literally talking picking up a spoon here - the whole nail moved back and started to lift off. I spent the best part of the day surreptitiously pressing them all back down again until I gave up in frustration and peeled them all off. Does anyone have a solution??

Products Used

• Primark false nail sets - available in store only
• Nailene Ultra Adhesive Tabs
• Total Cost = £3.59
• Prices based on what I paid for the whole look from scratch, and correct at the time of posting

One More Thing...

• I got the makeup gig for the theatrical production - yay me! - all 1920s silent movie decadence. I cannot wait.
• Awesome resource for printable MAC face charts - makeupanarchist.com/blank-mac-face-charts/
• That little lips trick with the white pencil in the middle to ape a pout? It's called Dog Booty Lips. I'm gettin' hip with the lingo.
• Why do I always need to sneeze just after I've done my mascara?
• And why do I always need the loo when I have freshly painted nails??
• And why can't I find my Revlon Lash Glue??? Help me, divas!

Hugs and kisses,
xxx

Rihanna Nails: You Da One Video

Hi Tory,

let each layer get bone dry before doing the next one

You asked me to do a how to tutorial for Rihanna's sharp and spiky nails in the "You Da One" video, and I said yes... and that I was working on it... and that it would be up the following week... and that it would definitely be up the following week... and here it is. Finally. I hope you like it. ;)

One thing I noticed when I was researching the look in the video, is that there are actually two nail designs - both triangular, but one is black/white, and the other is black/white/grey. I found a million tutorials for the former but none for the latter, and to be honest, it's the more interesting look of the two. It's pretty straightforward to do as long as you let each layer get bone dry before doing the next one, and make sure that you pull the tape off as soon as you've put on the polish.

I'm also liking the Clockwork Orange look she's rocking in the video - you can never go wrong with spiky lashes and a bowler hat. And check out Canada's Next Top Model. Seriously.

Products Used

• MUA Nail Polish in All Nude
• MUA Nail Polish in Shade 2
• Primark Nail Polish in Light Grey... this is probably no longer available as they tend to switch up their makeup pretty fast, so a good substitute is NYC's In a New York Color Minute in Prey of Grey
• NYC In a New York Color Minute in Grand Central Station
• Micropore or sellotape
• Total Cost = £5.58
• Prices based on what I paid for the whole look from scratch, and correct at the time of posting

Hugs and kisses,
xxx

Cramps Nails for Hallowe'en

Hi Tory,

the great thing about this look is that you don't need a steady hand and you can be really creative with it

Hallowe'en is my favourite time of the year. Like, major league, in your face, can't wait, breathless excitement favourite time of the year. I love scary movies, gore, candy, cold nights and general witchiness. And I love psychobilly music too, so I figured that I'd put the two together and come up with some funky nail art for the season, based on the screaming neon colours and dripping lettering for the old Cramps and Misfits posters. The great thing about this look is that you don't need a steady hand and you can be really creative with it.

On a side note, my first ever Hallowe'en costume, at the age of four, was a paper tiger. Seriously. A rectangular paper tiger shape that went over my head. Couldn't eat, couldn't sit down, hot as hell, and I looked like a dork. Mum thought I looked cute - ask her about it and I bet she uses that exact word. Every year after that I was a witch with a mouth full of chocolate. I was a smart kid. ;)

And if you ask anyone of my generation who also happened to grow up in North America - "Do you know anything about orange UNICEF boxes?" you'll see a lot of eye rolling. We all had to carry them around to collect charity money, and they got in the way of candy, which is all kids really care about. And no one ever donated anything...except when my friend Susan dressed as an orphan and sat in the shopping mall with her box for the entire day looking sad and deprived and winsome. She made $50, dumped the box at home and went out and had a candy frenzy in the evening. On reflection, I wasn't a smart kid... she was. She's probably a CEO of a major corporation now. Thumbs up Susan wherever you are.

Products Used

• Primark Nail Polish Set in Neon... these may not be available any more, so good substitutes are the Barry M neon range
• MUA Nail Polish in Shade 2
• Primark Nail Art pen in Black... again, this is probably no longer available as they tend to switch up their makeup pretty fast, Claire's Accessories do a range of nail art pens, or you could use an old pen nib and the MUA Shade 2 to create the freeform blobs and drips
• NYC In a New York Color Minute in Grand Central Station
• Total Cost = £5.79
• Prices based on what I paid for the whole look from scratch, and correct at the time of posting

Hugs and kisses,
xxx

Primark Rant

Hi Tory,

Like I say in the video - I do feel a little churlish ranting about a bargain basement product, but customer satisfaction still matters even when the product is low cost!

Hugs and kisses,
xxx