I RECENTLY LOST all of my nails - and you know how much I love my long talons. So now I have stumpy little stumpsteins from Stumpsylvania. Ugh. "Not to worry," I thought. "I'll get me some of them thar stick on nails. That'll do the trick."
Now it just so happens that I was in Primarni, and it just so happens that they have some oh-so-cute sets of false nails, and it just so happens that they are only £1 per set. Yes, ladies and lady boys, one pound of yer actual sterling on these beauties. (I had to buy two sets obviously - one is never enough. I'm paraphrasing Jacqueline Susann here, natch. Sparkle, Neely, sparkle!!)
What I didn't want to do, after years' of bitter experience, was use nail glue. Horrible stuff. Does terrible damage to your real nails and is a nightmare to get the false ones off. Really bad. Avoid it like the plague. So... what's a diva to do? Here's where the stickers part came in - press on, pull off. No mess, no damage, really simple, right?
Well... yes and no. The pull off part was the main problem. They were incredibly simple to put on and looked fantastic and professional and cute and all that - for literally five minutes. And then any amount of pressure that I put on my nails - and I'm literally talking picking up a spoon here - the whole nail moved back and started to lift off. I spent the best part of the day surreptitiously pressing them all back down again until I gave up in frustration and peeled them all off. Does anyone have a solution??
- Primark false nail sets - available in store only
- Nailene Ultra Adhesive Tabs
- Total Cost = £3.59
- Prices based on what I paid for the whole look from scratch, and correct at the time of posting
One More Thing...
- I got the makeup gig for the theatrical production - yay me! - all 1920s silent movie decadence. I cannot wait.
- Awesome resource for printable MAC face charts - makeupanarchist.com/blank-mac-face-charts/
- That little lips trick with the white pencil in the middle to ape a pout? It's called Dog Booty Lips. I'm gettin' hip with the lingo.
- Why do I always need to sneeze just after I've done my mascara?
- And why do I always need the loo when I have freshly painted nails??
- And why can't I find my Revlon Lash Glue??? Help me, divas!
Hugs and kisses,